the most amazing healthy chocolate cake recipe eva

Roses really smell like… nah just kidding they were divine!

I know you’re here for the freakin’ cake recipe so don’t worry I’m not gonna share some sob story about my weight-loss/health journey, or my husband or my babies (sorry not sorry) before I give it to you. Nor will I make you scroll through 10 pictures of the same cake from different angles.

1 cup ground almonds/almond meal
1 cup rice flour
1/2 cup cacao powder
1/3 cup melted coconut oil
1 cup coconut sugar
1/4 cup almond milk (or regular milk)
3 free-range-eggs
1 tsp baking soda
1 tsp baking powder
1 tsp pure vanilla essence

Mix errthang together and bake for 25-30 min at 180C

Frosting:
1 avocado
2 ripe bananas
1/4 cup cacao powder (or a little more)
4 tbsp honey (or a little less)

Throw frosting ingredients in a food processor or blender until combined. Spread on COOLED cake and OH MY GOD CAKE.

REFRIGERATE

Healthy Chocolate Waffles

Everyday i’m waffling (in both senses of the word).

These waffles are super healthy (in addition to being super yum) so if your waffle maker is shit, you’re gonna be in trouble. For best results, use the non-stick variety otherwise grease your waffle-maker with a little oil.

1 free-range egg
1 ripe banana
2 tbsp raw honey
1 cup of almond milk
1 tsp pure vanilla extract
1 cup wholemeal flour
1/2 cup almond meal
1/2 cup raw cacao powder
2 tsp baking powder

Place all the ingredients in a food processor and whizz until smooth.

Cook waffles according to the instructions of your waffle-maker.

I served ours with fresh fruit and drizzles of sunshine and by sunshine, I’m referring to sweet sweet organic honey!

Also good with nut butter or homemade nutella or both.

*dairy-free
*refined-sugar free

Next Level Orange Chocolate Cake

Four wonderful words to kick off your lazy Sunday afternoon: healthy. orange. chocolate. cake.

After three years of arduous study I am officially graduating in TWO days. Yep, two. To celebrate, I baked this super yum and super healthy orange chocolate cake.

Now, there’s several orange chocolate cake recipes out there but this one is by far the best. Why? Because it contains no refined-sugar, gluten, dairy or oil/butter!

So basically, it’s salad.

Side note: a flustered woman came in to my work and ordered a takeaway carbonara the other day. She said she’d had a bad day and so deserved a creamy pasta. I don’t care what anyone says, sometimes emotional eating is needed. But not in the way that most people think. Instead, we need to practise feeding our bodies/emotions with love and goodness. All I’m trying to say is, she probably felt worse after the pasta.

What’s that saying? “I love you like a fat kid loves cake?” Well, I love cake like ALL HUMANS  love cake (a lot) but I also care about my well-being and health. And by health, I mean I want to look good in skimpy clothing this summer. Dear followers, my advice is to make healthy treats, keep them around the house and if emotional eating ensues, treat yourself; the right way!

2 whole oranges
2 cups ground almonds
1 cup coconut sugar 
1/3 cup raw cacao powder
4 free range eggs
1 tsp pure vanilla extract
1 tsp baking soda

Place whole oranges in a large pot and cover with water. Bring to the boil and boil for 1 hour. Drain and then allow to cool. (Patience is a virtue my friend.)

Preheat oven to 160 C

Cut oranges in half and place in to a food processor (skin pith, flesh and all) alongside the remaining cake ingredients then process until smooth.

Pour batter in to a greased cake tin and bake for 40-50 minutes or until a fork comes out clean.

Let cool completely before removing from cake tin.

Once cake is completely cooled, dust with raw cacao.

Thank me later.

BECAUSEPAYDAY

“Too much of a good thing can be wonderful!” -Mae West

First, place 150g of roughly chopped, good quality dark chocolate and 1/2 cup of coconut cream in a small saucepan over extremely low heat.

Second, whisk continuously until chocolate and cream have melted together then immediately remove from heat.

Last but not least, dunk dunk dunkaroo to your heart’s content.

*gluten-free
*vegan

Decadent Beetroot Chocolate Cake

“Never trust a skinny baker” is no longer a thing. Yep, I just complimented myself (try it, it’s nice). Today I share with you my take on Jaime Oliver’s beetroot chocolate cake, only HEALTHY. I almost named it “holy crap” cake because “holy crap” were the initial words that escaped my mouth after taking my first mouthful. This cake is not only delicious but also highly nutritious. I mean, beetroot, avocado and banana? Come on! It’s basically salad but it tastes like heaven. You know what? I’mma eat the whole thing and not even bother claiming it an accident! #negativecalories #foodbaby

Sceptical about the fruit/vege and chocolate combination? If so, I’ve got two words for you: CARROT CAKE.

PS It’s naturally free from gluten, dairy and refined-sugar. And I’m pretty sure you can sub the eggs for about 4 tbsp apple sauce to make it vegan.

So go on, bake it! It’s SO easy and I guarantee your lover/kids/bff/mother will LOVE it and most importantly, benefit from it!

2 cups almond meal
2 cups raw beetroot, peeled and grated (WARNING: it’s a damn messy process)
1/2 cup oil (sunflower, coconut or olive)
3/4 cup raw cacao powder
1 cup coconut sugar (or 1/2 cup honey or maple syrup)
3 free range eggs
1 1/2 tsp baking soda
1 tsp apple cider vinegar

Frosting:
1/2 large avocado  or 1 whole small avocado
1/2 banana 
1/4 cup cacao powder
2 tbsp honey or maple syrup

Preheat oven to 160 C

Simply blend cake ingredients in a food processor until smooth.

Pour into a greased cake tin and bake for 25-30 minutes.

When the fork comes out clean, remove from oven and allow to cool completely – hate this step, just cant wait.

Blend frosting ingredients in a food processor or blender until smooth.

Spread on top of cooled cake and decorate with whatever your heart desires – I used a flower and crushed hazelnuts.

More, Please!

These rustic dark chocolate nut clusters don’t have much going for them in looks (hence the “rustic”), but they sure do taste great. Nom nom, so moreish – I just can’t get enough! So incredibly easy to prepare, I’d hardly consider the following a “recipe”.

250grams of good quality dark chocolate (nut clusters are everywhere, it’d be much easier to buy already made ones instead but as with all healthy foods, what makes these treats “healthier” is their good quality ingredients – I used 85% dark chocolate)
1/4 almond milk
1 1/2 cups of raw skinless nuts (I used silvered almonds, raw cashews and chopped peanuts)

In a small pot on very low heat, melt the chocolate and almond milk until smooth and combined

Place the melted chocolate and raw nuts into a bowl and mix well.

Take tablespoonfuls of the mixture and place onto a plate or tray lined with baking paper.

Refrigerate to set.

PS feel free to adapt the “recipe” by adding spices, dessicated coconut, dried fruit and/or orange zest!

Review No9 Le Panier Boulangerie

Instagram is a b****. I don’t know about you but I’m sick of seeing pictures of fashion models holding nuttela crepes in front of the Eiffel tower (of course a male model in that position is a whole other story). For us somewhat secluded Kiwi’s, the city of lurve is not a mere plane ticket away (more like 5 – especially if you’re cheap/poor like me and end up purchasing a shit flight with a thousand stopovers). Consequently, sometimes a gal needs to get more creative in order to get her pastry fix. In Christchurch, Le Panier Boulangerie is the closest you’ll get to your much-needed Parisian get away.

As vital as eating healthy food is to your overall wellbeing, so is an occasional  treat (emphasis on occasional). With all those green smoothies and unpronounceable healthy-foods down our gobs, sometimes, believe it or not, were not “already sweet enough”.  I know of many people who love to indulge in a greasy cheeseburger or a creamy frosted donut for their “cheat meal”. However; I like my  “naughty” treats to be rich and decadent.  Call me pretentious but I like my treats high quality: fresh strawberries dipped in luxurious Swiss chocolate, ricotta and lemon tart, that sort of thing. So if that’s got your taste buds tingling, then I guarantee Le Panier is bound to have you salivating like theres no tomorrow!

Today I treated myself to an absolutely divine tart au chocolat. I adored it. I wanted to marry it. Seriously, I even shut my eyes and made those annoying mmmm noises throughout the entire indulging experience. Do you need anymore proof?!

I totes recommend you go! ASAP.

Chocolate for Breakfast

Two months ago on my birthday, I treated myself by devouring chocolate cake for breakfast. As you can imagine, the experience was beyond amazing! Lately, after further pursuing my passion for healthy eating, I reached the glorious discovery that I can have chocolate for breakfast without consuming copious calories and instead actually earning some good-health brownie points! “HOWWW?” I hear your howl; via this heavenly chocolate chia pudding of course!

Not only is this simple breakfast pudding high in protein, fibre, omega 3, antioxidants and calcium, it is also free from gluten, dairy and refined-sugar. In other words, it’s basically salad.

Most importantly though, it’s also absolutely freakin’ delicious!

So go on, treat yourself and I promise you’ll LOVE it! If you don’t (highly unlikely), I give you permission to throw it at my face, for which, I’ll thank you later!

1 cup almond or coconut milk
3 tbsp raw cacao powder
3 tbsp chia seeds
1/4 cup unsweetened desiccated coconut
1 heaped tbsp honey

plain yoghurt (I used coconut yoghurt for a dairy-free alternative)
silvered almonds and frozen berries to decorate

Place the milk, cacao powder, chia seeds, coconut and honey in a jar and mix well. I mean, really well – some serious mixing action is required here.

Refrigerate overnight.

In the morning, mix again then top with plain yoghurt, silvered almonds and berries.

Decadent Chocolate and Raspberry Cupcakes

Nutritious cupcakes. Need I say more?

1/4 cup coconut oil (melted)
1 cup fresh or defrosted raspberries
1/4 cup honey
1 cup almond meal
4 free range eggs
1/2 teaspoon baking soda
1/2 cup raw cacao powder or good quality cocoa powder
silvered almonds to decorate

Preheat oven to 160 C

In a food processor, whizz all the ingredients together for 1-2 minutes or until smooth.

Pour batter into a lined or greased muffin tray then top with silvered almonds.

Bake for 20 minutes or until the fork comes out clean.

Let cool before nom-nom-nom

Salted Orange and Chocolate Pretzel Sandwiches

This post is dedicated to my friend Isaac Hindin-Miller – fashion writer and relationship enthusiast behind Issac Likes for the endless support and encouragement regarding my blog. Isaac gives some pretty dope relationship advice on http://www.isaaclikes.com which has inspired me to give you a little counsel of my own. Last year, I went through the most miserable break-up (yep, that escalated rather quickly) and I, like the multitudes of other heartbroken individuals constantly used sugar to solace my emotions. My simple advice is: Don’t. Instead, try and put all your pain, sorrow and negative energy into creating something beneficial. If you’re anything like me (an emotional eater), by keeping plenty of healthy treats handy, you’re bound to save yourself from unnecessary trouble.

Not only are these delicious pretzel sandwiches the perfect combination of sweet and salty, they’re also free from gluten, dairy and refined sugar. In other words; 99% guilt-free.

1 cup almond meal
10 medjool dates 
zest of one orange
juice of one orange
1/2 cup raw cacao powder

Bag of pretzels (gluten-free options available at most supermarkets)

In a food processor mix the almond meal and dates into a flour-like consistency.

Add the orange zest, orange juice and cacao powder and mix again until a dough-like mixture is formed.

Using your hands, form small balls then sandwich between two pretzels.

Store in a covered container in the fridge in between snacking.

Fun fact: The average American consumes about 1.5 pounds, thats 0.7 kg of pretzels per year!